


An Unwelcome Proposal

by Jessica_Bones_Winchester



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-14
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-06-02 03:26:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6548734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jessica_Bones_Winchester/pseuds/Jessica_Bones_Winchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Astrid (OFC) finally admits she has feelings for Loki, but she soon learns of an agreement that puts her new love in jeopardy. (pre-Thor movie)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Astrid stepped out of her coach with a smile on her face. Her eyes found the window of the room in the palace that she knew was his, as they always did, as she went inside.

Frigga would be in the garden, so she started there. That was, after all, the reason for her visit. The only reason she would admit, anyway.

As soon as Frigga saw her approaching, Astrid stopped to curtsy.

"My Queen," Astrid said.

"Astrid, sweet child." Frigga extended her hand. "Walk with me. How was your trip?"

"It was wonderful. I want to thank you again for allowing me to represent the palace along with my father. It was such an honor."

"You are well worthy of it. You've practically grown up before my eyes, running around the palace with my sons."

"Speaking of your sons," Astrid said, "where might I find them?"

"I believe Loki is in the library."

"And Thor?" Astrid asked, as she tried to keep her feelings out of her voice.

"He's away at training. He should be back tomorrow."

"That's disappointing. I was hoping to say hello."

"Well, my dear, you know you always have a room here."

"I may take you up on that, My Queen. I think I'll go say hello to Loki."

She curtsied once more, and waited for Frigga to nod at her before she turned away. Swift feet carried her to the library, but she hesitated going in. She had rehearsed the moment a million times in her head, telling Loki that she was in love with him. The long trip away made her realize just how deep her feelings were.

She took a deep breath and entered through the large, heavy doors. On the far side of the room, Loki sat back in a chair, book in hand with his feet on the table, crossed at the ankles. Astrid smiled and walked toward him. When he looked up at her, she lost her nerve.

"Astrid!" He stood and embraced her, his book forgotten on the table.

"Miss me, Loki?"

"Darling, I always feel your absence. When you're gone it's just Thor and his warrior friends. They can be such bores."

"Aren't they your friends as well?"

"If we must put a label on it. How was your trip?"

Loki guided Astrid into a chair, and she told him all about it. She noticed how intently he listened. He always listened to her that way.

"Welcome to the world of Nobility," Loki said and sat back in his chair. "It starts off fun, then steadily becomes a burden."

"It's an honor."

"It's a duty."

"Not for me. I hold no office or station. I was allowed to go along with my father. I don't know how often I'll get the privilege."

Astrid played with the long, flowing folds of her dress, and stared at her lap while her mind raced. She should tell him, but how?

"What's troubling you?" Loki asked.

"Nothing. What could possibly be troubling me?"

"I don't know. That's why I asked."

"But why would you think-"

"Because you have your troubled look."

"My what?"

"You always stare at your lap and fidget when you're anxious about something," Loki said. "It would be cute if I didn't know that worry lay beneath it."

"Honestly," she hesitated, "there's something I desperately want to tell you, but I don't know how."

"Just say it, Astrid. Spit it out."

"This isn't something you just spit out."

Loki took her hand. "You're starting to make me worry. Is it bad?"

"No... At least, I don't think so."

"Well, then, just say it."

Astrid stared at her hand in his, then looked up into his eyes.

"I love you, Loki."

Loki smiled. "I love you, too, darling."

Astrid shook her head and stood. She pulled her hand from Loki's and turned away.

"No. I love you. Not like a brother or a friend I grew up with. I am in love with you."

She felt his hand on her hip, and her hair brush away from her ear, replaced by Loki's warm breath.

"And I'm in love with you," he said.

Loki's hand slid across her back and came to rest on her other hip as she turned to him.

"You are?" she asked. "I had no idea."

"I always kept it to myself. To be frank, I thought you had feelings for Thor."

"Of course, I love Thor, but-"

"You always seemed to gravitate toward him. Whenever we're all together, you're usually at Thor's side."

Astrid smiled, and a blush touched her cheeks.

"So I can look at you without anyone noticing that I'm staring," she said.

Loki chuckled. "Well, your deception worked. Half the palace thinks you're in love with Thor."

"Stop exaggerating."

"I'm not," Loki said with a chuckle.

"Does Thor think that?"

"No, he's so blinded by his training. That's all he thinks about."

"Thank goodness for that! Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why would I bring that up?"

"Honestly? I can't believe you didn't tease me over it."

"Darling," he whispered and pulled her closer, "I know I tease you mercilessly over many things-"

"Many, many things."

"But I tease you out of love. To tease you over your attraction to another man would be torture for me. Even more so since it was Thor."

"But I'm not attracted to Thor."

"I know that now, but only because you told me. I wish you would have said something sooner."

"I didn't think you felt the same way, and I didn't want to ruin what we have as friends."

Loki lifted her face with a finger under her chin.

"You're the only person I've ever cared to call 'friend,'" he said, "but I'd rather call you 'my love.'"

"I'd like that," Astrid said with a smile.

Loki leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. He sighed when he pulled away.

"You can't imagine how long I've wanted to do that," he said.

"Yes, I can."

Loki brushed his thumb across her cheek. "We've wasted so much time."

"I know." She put a hand to his chest. "Maybe we can make up for some of it?"

"What did you have in mind?"

Astrid watched as a grin spread across Loki's face. She lifted herself on her toes and pressed her lips to his. His arms wrapped around her waist and he lifted her from the floor as he deepened the kiss.

He placed her back on her feet as he broke the kiss, but he kept his arms firmly around her.

"It's getting late. As much as I hate to let you leave, you shouldn't be on the road after dark."

"Your mother graciously offered me a room for the night."

"I would love to see you at breakfast."

"I would like that, too."

"But, perhaps, you can sit next to me, instead of my brother, if he has returned by then."

"If you insist."

"Oh, I insist."

"Then I have no choice but to obey my Prince."

Loki groaned. "What shall we do the rest of the night?"

"How about a walk?"

"Not what I had in mind."

"Let's not rush this, Loki."

"Just so long as I can kiss you, my love."

"I insist upon that."

"Then I know of a field, just beyond the city borders. It has large trees, and a running stream. We could ride out and be there by sunset."

"And how do you know this place? Is this where you take all your conquests?" Astrid asked with a grin.

"I've never taken anyone there. I go there to get away and be alone, but I would love to take you there."

Astrid kissed him and agreed. In the stables, Loki helped Astrid onto his horse, then climbed up in front of her.

"Put your arms around my waist to hold on," he said.

"I was going to do that anyway," she whispered in his ear.

They remained quiet as they rode. Astrid kept a firm grip around Loki's waist. His hand occasionally rubbed over her arm when the terrain was smooth, and he could control the horse without both hands on the reins. They rode through the city, toward a forest that lay at its edge. Loki led the horse a few kilometers into the trees before turning off of the path.

"I thought you said this was a field we are going to?"

"You'll see," Loki said.

They rode for several minutes before Astrid saw that there was a brighter light in the distance. As they got closer, she realized it was the tree line, which they soon broke through. It was indeed a rolling green field.

"It's beautiful!"

Loki pointed to the right, far ahead, to a shimmering light.

"That's the stream," he said. "Crystal clear water. It sparkles best at sunset."

He rode toward it, where it was shaded by a few lush trees, where Loki could tie up his horse. He helped Astrid dismount, and pulled her into his arms.

"Welcome to my hidden paradise."

"How is it that no one else has found this place?"

Loki shrugged. "A little bit of magic."

"A shield?"

"Of sorts."

"It's amazing."

Loki took her hand and sat close to the bank of the stream. Astrid watched the water move swiftly over the rock bed beneath. She felt Loki's hand brush over her back, then to her neck.

"I've imagined bringing you here so many times."

"And what did we do here in your imagination?"

"This. Just sit together." He moved behind her and pulled her back to him, so that his legs were on either side of her. He kissed her neck. "And maybe some kissing."

"I like that."

"And maybe, something more..."

"Loki-"

"I know. You don't want to rush."

"I don't want to skip this courting phase," she said with a smile.

"Ah, you see, you always played rough with the boys, but I knew you secretly loved the girly stuff."

"My mother made sure of that."

"However, I do recall one time when Thor refused to let you on his new horse. He had just turned fifteen, and you were twelve."

"Goodness, Loki, that was ages ago!"

"I know. I still remember the tears in your eyes... but you refused to cry. I saw that stubbornness in you, even then."

"And you let me ride your horse, instead."

"I got you up, got behind you-"

"And you let me take the reins."

"I just wanted to see you smile."

Astrid giggled. "So, what you're telling me is that you knew you loved me even when you were fourteen?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying."

Astrid sat up and turned to Loki with a her mouth agape.

"I was joking, Loki."

"I'm not. It started out chaste and innocent enough. I knew I always wanted to be the one to make you laugh, smile, or just make you happy. I wanted to protect you. It wasn't until you turned sixteen, and your mother started making you dress a little more like a Lady that I realized just how beautiful you are. I mean, I always thought you were beautiful, but..." Loki brushed his fingers over her cheek, "Darling, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever known."

Astrid shook her head and tried to take in everything he told her. "I don't know what to say."

"Tell me you love me."

"I do love you. So much."

She kissed him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Her fingers played in his hair as he returned the kiss so fervently that she had to lean back in his arms. Astrid slowed the kiss until Loki stopped for breath.

"How long have we wasted?" Astrid said. "We could have been together so long ago... centuries."

The last ray of light disappeared as the Asgardian sun fell below the horizon. Astrid ran her thumb over Loki's jawline.

"How is it that your eyes shine so brightly even in the dim moonlight?"

"Because they see you."

"Loki, I've never heard you speak this way before."

"I wouldn't speak this way about anyone else, and I couldn't when I thought you wanted Thor."

"Why not?"

"I just wanted you to be happy, my love."

Astrid just stared at him.

"I've left you speechless again?"

Astrid simply nodded.

"Then just tell me you love me, darling. That's all I need to hear."

"I love you."

They kissed under the stars for a long while before Loki stood.

"We should get back."

"I hate to leave this place," Astrid said.

"We will return. I promise."

Loki helped her to her feet and back onto the horse.

"I'm not quite sure how to tell you this," Astrid said, "but my father may not be too pleased about us."

"Displeased that your chosen suitor is the Prince of Asgard?"

"I think he's always wanted to make that choice for me, in a way... to find me the perfect husband. Or, what he considers the perfect husband."

"We will figure out how to tell him. Until then, we won't tell anyone."

"A hidden love affair?"

"Do you object?"

"No," she said with a smile. "It's kind of romantic."

Loki escorted Astrid to the room she would be staying in. It was the same room that she had stayed in so many times before throughout her life.

Sure that no one was watching, Loki pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply. His hands moved over her back until she pulled away.

"We'll get caught," she whispered.

Loki groaned, but released her. "I'll see you at breakfast."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."


	2. Chapter 2

Loki was already at the table the next morning. Astrid sat next to him after saying good morning. The rest of the seats were empty.

"Where is everyone?"

"Father and Mother usually share breakfast in their room. The warriors and Thor have not yet returned."

As if on cue, a loud laugh echoed through the halls, followed by the sound of several different voices. Loki rolled his eyes.

"My brother..."

When Thor came into the room his eyes fell straight to Astrid. He went to her as she stood to hug him, and he lifted her from the ground, twirling her before setting her back on her feet.

"When did you arrive? Thor asked.

"Yesterday. It was late, so I stayed the night."

"Always a pleasure to see your face. Don't you agree?" he said as he gripped Loki's shoulder.

"Very much," Loki said with a smile.

Astrid returned to her seat next to Loki as Thor went around to the other side of the table, along with his friends.

"We ran into your parents on the road in," Thor said.

"Did you? They're coming here?"

"They should be here soon, actually. You father is meeting with mine."

"Probably to discuss the trip," Astrid said.

"Oh, yes! Your first trip for palace business! How did it go?"

Astrid filled him in while they all ate. They stayed there long after they were done, talking and laughing. Astrid tensed when she felt long fingers brush over her knee, then the weight of Loki's hand resting there. He gave it a firm squeeze, and Astrid smiled.

A servant came in and announced that the King wished to see Thor, Loki, and Astrid.

"What could this be about?" Loki asked.

"I guess we will have to go find out." Astrid squeezed the hand on her knee before she stood and followed the servant. Loki and Thor weren't far behind.

When they entered the throne room, Odin called Thor and Astrid forward. Frigga motioned for Loki to join her beside Astrid's parents.

"What is this about?" Loki whispered.

"You will soon see," Frigga said.

Odin stood before his throne and addressed the group.

"It has been a long time coming, but Astrid has proven herself a worthy representative of the palace, and, by extension, the throne of Asgard."

Astrid bowed her head as a thank you.

"Astrid," Odin continued, "your parents and I have long sought a firmer union for our families. They have served Asgard well, and raised a daughter worthy of the title of Queen. Therefore, let it be known, that Astrid is henceforth intended to Thor, future King of Asgard."

The small smile that had graced Astrid's face fell away as her eyes darted first to Thor, then to her parents.

"What?"

"Quiet, child," her father said.

"But I'm not in love with Thor! I-"

_Don't tell them_. She heard Loki's voice in her head. _It will only make it worse_.

"Mother, please," Astrid said.

"This is your future, Astrid, and the future of Asgard. This is best."

"Father," she heard Thor's voice next to her, "may I speak with Astrid alone?"

"We will leave you. Just remember that a King needs a strong and caring Queen by his side. Unless we can announce your marriage, we will not announce your rule."

"I understand, Father."

Odin ordered everyone out of the room. Loki caught Astrid's eye as he walked past her, and she again heard his voice in her head.

_I will wait for you in the forest, near our hidden place_.

When they were alone, Thor took her hand.

"Did you know about this?" Astrid asked.

"That Father intended to arrange marriage for me, yes. I admit, I even had suspicions that he was leaning toward you."

She pulled her hand away. "Why didn't you tell me? I could have stopped this!"

"Is the idea of being my wife that repulsive?"

"You know that's not what I mean."

"Do you not love me?"

"As a friend, yes."

"And could that love not grow?"

Astrid thought of Loki. Her love for him had grown out of friendship.

"Thor, are you honestly willing to marry someone on the hope that you might one day grow to love her as a wife?"

"No, I'm not." He took her hand. "I've loved you for a long time, Astrid."

Astrid pulled away again. "I need to sit down."

She looked about the room. The only seat was the throne. She chose one of the steps that led to it instead. Thor sat beside her.

"I know this is the worst way to find out. I hate that our parents did it this way."

"I need time to think. I need to be alone."

"Astrid, I think we should talk about this."

"I can't. Not right now."

Thor sighed. "All right. I will leave you, for now. Will you meet me this evening? We can talk over dinner."

"Yes."

He put his fingers lightly to her cheek and turned her face toward him.

"Do me one favor while you think?"

"What is that?"

"Think of the love you do have for me. I cannot be King without a Queen, and I want no Queen but you."

Astrid slipped out of the throne room unseen and ran to the stables. She found that Loki had the stableboy prepare a horse for her, and she had to do no explaining.

She rode hard toward the forest. Her bottom rarely touched the saddle except for the two times she had to sit and slow the horse as sobs escaped her.

Her eyes searched the tree line as she approached the forest, but Loki wasn't there. She slowed and stopped her horse to wait.

_Come into the trees, my love. I'm here_.

Astrid found the path and entered into the woods. Several kilometers later she saw Loki on his horse, but he left the trail before she reached him. She followed him from a distance until they reached the open field. When she was out of the trees, Loki's horse broke into a run, and Astrid urged her horse to follow. Under their tree, they dismounted, and Astrid fell into Loki's arms.

"They want me to marry Thor," she said. Tears flowed down her cheeks.

"I know, darling."

"Why didn't you let me tell them about us?"

"It only would have made it worse. They would have made sure we were kept apart. At least, this way, we can see each other until we figure things out."

Loki wiped the tears from her face.

"What will we do?" she asked.

"I'll talk to Thor," Loki said. "Once he realizes that we are in love, I'm sure he will step back. He will talk to Father."

Astrid shook her head. "No. Thor told me he loves me, and he believes that I will grow to love him one day. He wants to marry me, Loki. What's worse is that if I don't agree, Thor could lose his crown until he finds another wife. How can I do that to him?"

"Darling, how could they make that your burden? It's an awful thing to do."

"That's what it is, awful or not. I thought about us running away together, until Thor told me that. I just don't know what to do."

She pressed herself into Loki, holding him tightly. Loki kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back.

"Tell me you love me," he said.

"I love you."

"Do you trust me?"

"More than anyone."

Loki forced the words from his mouth. "Agree to marry him."

"What?" Astrid tried to pull away, but Loki kept a firm grip on her waist.

"Agree. They will likely move you into the palace."

"To spend more time with Thor!"

"Yes, but is he not your friend?"

"Loki-"

"Thor won't push you. That much I know. Spend time with him while I come up with a plan. And since you will be living in the palace, no one will think anything of all the time we will spend together."

"Especially since we are together so much already."

"Exactly," he said with a smile. "Do this. Be with Thor in public, and come to me in secret."

"People will know."

"Darling, I've shielded an entire field from prying eyes for centuries. I think I can cloak you as you come to my chamber."

"How long will I have to pretend?"

"Just until I can put something in place to free you without trouble, so that we can be together openly."

"That's not really an answer, is it?"

"Darling, whatever we decide to do must be well thought out. We can't rush or do anything in haste."

"I can't pretend to love Thor the way I love you."

"I don't want you to. Just pretend as if you're giving it a chance."

"Thor is expecting me for dinner tonight."

"Will you come to me after?"

"I will."

Loki kissed her in a way that claimed full possession of her. Her hands sank into his hair, while his hands roamed over her back and hips. Astrid moaned when his fingers brushed the side of her breast, and Loki pulled away.

"We should go back."

Astrid shook her head.

"Darling, we have to."

This time, she nodded.

"I love you, Loki."

"I love you, too."

After a long talk with her parents, in which they did all of the talking, Astrid met Thor for dinner. He pulled out her chair, and sat across from her at the table.

"I'm glad you at least agreed to dinner," he said.

"Thor-"

He held up his hand. "I know that this is not an easy decision. I know that inside you long to say no. You don't have to give me an answer tonight. I talked to my Father, and he agreed that we should give you time to adjust to the idea before demanding an answer.

"It's an unfair decision; Your crown or my happiness."

"I would never have asked if I did not truly love you, Astrid. I promise I would do all in my power to make you happy."

She looked at her friend for a long moment. "I don't doubt that you would."

Thor smiled. "That's a start."

After a while, Astrid was able to push the thought of marriage out of her mind, and talk to Thor as she always had. As a friend. He seemed pleased.

When the time came for them to part, Thor kissed the back of her hand. It was a gesture he had performed in the past, but it was different this time. He parted his lips slightly, and let them linger firmly on her skin.

"Shall I see you at breakfast?" he asked.

Astrid just nodded.

She made her way back to her room, wondering how she could get to Loki's unnoticed. Once inside her room, she leaned against the closed door and sighed.

"Tired, my love?"

Astrid stood straight at the sound of Loki's voice, and she ran into his arms when she saw him emerge from the shadows in the corner of the room.

"Just hold me," she whispered.

"All night, if you so wish."

"That wouldn't really be appropriate."

"Neither is sneaking off with my brother's intended."

She buried her face in his chest. "Then hold me."

"Should I step out while you change?"

She pulled away. "If you promise to behave, you can stay while I change behind the partition."

"I promise."

Astrid grabbed her night dress and brought it around the folding divider. Loki sat in a chair across the room and stared at the gap between the bottom of the partition and the floor. Astrid slipped off her shoes, and her dress pooled around her feet before she stepped out of it. A moment later she stepped out, dressed for bed.

"I think that may have been the start of an unhealthy obsession with your bare ankles," Loki said.

She looked down. "My ankles?"

"It was all I could see... but I'll take what I can get."

"You're incorrigible," she said with a grin.

"But you love me anyway."

"I do."

They pulled down her bed covers and he allowed her to get comfortable on her side before he climbed in behind her.

"What if someone looks for you in your room?" Astrid asked.

"It's not odd for me to be wandering about late at night. I often go to the library or walk the grounds."

"What if someone comes here?"

"Then I shall hide."

"I don't think I'll sleep tonight. This feels too dangerous."

"You think I'm dangerous?" he said with a grin.

"Not you, but what we're doing."

"Hmph. I kind of liked the idea of you thinking I'm dangerous."

He pulled himself closer against her and slipped his hand beneath the covers. He slowly pulled the fabric of her night dress up until she pushed his hand away with a giggle.

"I stand corrected. You are dangerous."

"Don't forget it."

He kissed her cheek and draped an arm over her waist, above the covers. They were soon asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

When Astrid woke the next morning, Loki was already gone. She couldn't help but feel a sting of disappointment. She dressed quickly and hurried to the dining hall for breakfast, hoping to find him there. When she entered the room, both Loki and Thor looked up at her and smiled. They sat on opposite sides of the long table, and Astrid made her way to Thor's side, as would be expected. He stood as she approached, and took her hand. His lips brushed over the back of her hand.

"Did you sleep well?" Thor asked.

"Very well, thank you." She turned to see Loki staring at her hand in Thor's. "Good morning, Loki."

He cleared his throat and forced a smile. "Good morning."

"You look lovely," Thor said.

_You look absolutely delicious_ \- she heard Loki in her head.

Astrid blushed and lowered her eyes. "Thank you."

Thor's smile beamed, thinking his words brought the redness to her cheeks. They sat, and Astrid let her eyes linger over Loki a moment before she noticed they had no food in front of them.

"I do hope you were not waiting on me," she said.

"Of course, we were," Thor said.

"What if I had been detained?" Astrid asked. Her eyes shifted to Loki, silently asking why he left before she woke.

"By what?" Thor asked.

"By anything. Purely hypothetical."

"We would still be waiting," Loki said. "It would be the gentlemanly thing to do, would it not?"

"Stop teasing," Astrid said.

"I'm not. Is Thor not courting you?"

Astrid's eyes locked onto Loki's.

_Am I not courting you?_ \- she heard in her head.

"That's true. I guess our relationship will have changed a bit."

Thor smiled. "I am still your friend, Astrid."

"Yes, I know." She put her hand on his. "And I am hungry."

"As am I," Loki said.

"And I," Thor added.

He called for the food to be served, and the three of them talked and laughed as they ate.

Once the empty plates were cleared, Astrid had her hands folded on top of the table. Loki watched as Thor took one of her hands and laced his fingers through hers.

"You are quite lovely," Thor said softly.

"You said that before," Astrid said.

"It is worth repeating."

Astrid looked into Thor's eyes, and almost wished she could feel a romantic love for him.

"You are too sweet," she said.

"Well," Loki said as he stood, "it seems I am a third wheel here."

"You don't need to leave, Loki," Astrid said.

"Actually, I do. Father asked to see me after breakfast, and I've lingered long enough."

Thor nodded.

_Play the part, love_ \- Astrid heard Loki in her head - _but your lips are mine. Keep them that way_.

"We will see you later, then?"

"Of course."

Astrid wanted to watch him walk away, but Thor's eyes were on her, and she knew she couldn't risk it.

"What are your plans for the day?" she asked.

"Our plans, my sweet Astrid."

"Oh? I wasn't aware I had plans for the day."

"I have taken the liberty. I hope you don't mind."

"That will depend on what you have planned," she said with a smile.

Thor laughed. "Fair enough! I thought we could start the day riding."

"That sounds lovely."

"I will bring along some provisions, and when we get hungry, we will find a shady spot to eat."

"Lovelier, still."

Thor had a third horse packed with baskets of food and wine, and a large blanket. That horse was tied to his own, and they set out on a casual ride through the countryside. Astrid would occasionally pull ahead and break into a gallop before returning to Thor's side. He always had a smile on his face.

"The sun is overhead," Thor said. "Shall we stop to eat?"

"I guess so," she said, then pointed off into the distance. "How about under that tree?"

As Thor tied up the horses, Astrid thought of Loki doing the same in their secret place. She spread the blanket and sat before pulling things from the baskets.

"This is a feast!" she said.

"You deserve nothing less."

They ate and talked, until Thor scooted closer to her.

"I am growing tired of this polite conversation," he said.

"Would you rather be rude to each other?"

"I would rather learn about you."

"You already know me, Thor. We've been friends for ages."

"But now we are to be more than friends. This is not a normal courtship. I'm not learning your hobbies and preferences. I know those things, as you've said."

"Then what shall we talk about?"

"Tell me how to win your heart."

Be Loki, she thought.

"I don't know if even I can tell you that," she said.

"Don't tease."

"No, it's just... I think the things that truly capture our hearts are unexpected. The little things that we would never think of."

Thor took her hand. "Have I done nothing to win even the smallest piece of your heart?"

Astrid looked away. He was trying so hard, and the truth would break his heart. She reached back into her memory and smiled.

"There was a night once when I was here visiting with my parents," she said. "There was a particularly nasty storm."

"I remember that night. I found you wandering the corridors in the middle of the night."

She nodded. "What I never told you is that I was scared out of my mind. The palace is so open, and it echoes so loudly-"

"I could tell you were nervous of the weather."

"Well, I was looking for someone, anyone really, to take my mind off of it. When you found me, you sat with me until the storm passed without my asking. You just seemed to know."

"Is that all?"

"You comforted me, Thor. Whether you knew it or not, you took care of me."

Thor ran the back of his finger down her cheek.

"If you let me, I will take care of you forever."

Thor leaned in, but Astrid pulled back as he did.

"Not even on the cheek?" he asked.

"I can't."

Thor raised her hand to his lips, and kissed the back of her fingers. He let his mouth open slightly, and let the kiss linger until Astrid pulled her hand away.

"I need to take a break." She stood.

"A break from what?"

"From this... I just... I need to ride. Will you wait here?"

Thor stood and nodded. "As long as it takes, I will wait."

Astrid mounted her horse and took off at a gallop. She rode with no destination in mind; she needed to feel free for a moment. She just headed for the horizon in front of her until she heard Loki's voice in her head.

_Meet me in our place_.

Astrid smiled and changed direction.

When she saw Loki, her smile faded. He was pacing beneath their tree, and there was no light in his eyes when he smiled at her.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she dismounted.

"I'm going away."

"What?"

"Father is sending me on a trip for palace business."

"Why does it have to be you?"

Loki hesitated. "They want me out of the way."

"Who?"

"Your parents... and my father."

"They know about us?"

"No, but they know we are close, and they think I will interfere with your time alone with Thor."

"How long?"

"Two weeks."

"Loki, we need to tell them."

"They will never allow it. Your father will hate me."

"I don't care. We'll leave."

"Astrid, darling, I know you don't mean that."

She wrapped her arms around Loki's waist and held him tight as tears slipped down her cheeks. His hands ran soothingly over her back.

"I love you," she whispered.

"I know you do. I love you. But this may be for the best."

"How can you say that?"

"This morning was torture for me. To see you with Thor. To see his lips on you that way. The way he looks at you."

Astrid put a hand to his face. "It means nothing to me."

"I know, darling."

"Speaking of this morning..."

"Why did I leave before you woke?"

She nodded. "I thought you would still be there."

"I knew if you woke up in my arms that I would have kept you there all day. And not for sleeping."

Astrid blushed.

"If you only knew the feelings you stirred in me," Loki said. His voice was deep with desire.

Loki brushed his thumb across her lips before capturing them with his own. He wrapped both arms around her waist and pulled her tight against himself. When Astrid's hand slid down his back and onto his rear, he moaned and pulled away.

"I thought you wanted to take this slow."

"You will be gone for two weeks. And after your confession about how I make you feel... I just wanted you to know how you make me feel."

Loki kissed her again, but held her wrists in his hands to avoid the temptation of her touch.

"I have to go."

Astrid nodded. "I should get back to Thor before he comes looking for me."

"You go first. I'll leave soon."

"I love you."

"I love you. I'll be counting the minutes until I can see you again."

Astrid mounted her horse. With one last glance back at Loki, she urged her horse forward. Slowly, at first, she rode remembering the feel of Loki beneath her fingers and wrapped around her. Then, she snapped the reigns, and the horse took off.

Thor rose to his feet when he saw her approaching. If only she could love him, everything would be simpler. If only he were Loki, everything would be perfect.

How could she go these two weeks without Loki to lean on? Who would she run to when she felt like her world was caving in on her, pretending to be okay marrying a man she didn't love?

There was no one.

Thor helped her from her horse and drew her into an embrace.

"I was beginning to think you would not return."

"I told you that I would."

"Something clouds your eyes."

"You know what that is."

"But there is more than just hesitation." He lifted her chin and searched her eyes. "Is there another, Astrid?"

"If there is?" Astrid hoped against all hope that this was her way out. Would Thor step aside if she were in love with someone else?

"Tell me. I would meet him and fight for your love."

She lowered her face and shook her head. "There is no one else."

"Then you simply do not love me."

"I do love you, Thor... Just-"

"Not as I love you. Well, that can change."

"Part of me wishes I could love you that way."

"That is something to build on," Thor said with a smile.

"But-"

Thor put a finger to her lips.

"None of that."

His hand moved to caress her face, and his thumb brushed over her lips.

"Shall we return home?"

Astrid nodded.

The days went on much the same over the next week. Thor had yet to try to kiss her again, but he kept some kind of physical contact almost constantly. Astrid found that if she looked on it as affection from a friend it didn't bother her so much, and she was able to enjoy their time together, much to Thor's delight.

At the end of the week, Astrid's father spoke to her privately in her chambers. She sat in front of him while he paced back and forth.

"The Allfather tells me that your time with Thor has been pleasant."

"Very pleasant."

"Yet you won't accept his proposal."

"I am not in love with him, Father."

"I do not care about your silly notions of love. You can grow to love him." He leaned down toward her, his voice almost deadly quiet. "You will marry Thor. You will be Queen."

"I do not care about a title."

"Quiet!" He stood with his hands behind his back, as if her future were nothing but business. "I have given you this time to come to terms with the situation. It is not my fault you have failed to do so. The Allfather has agreed that a small, private ceremony will do for now. You can have the large wedding after Thor is crowned King."

Astrid's eyes grew wide as she gripped the arms of her chair.

"What are you saying?"

"You will be wed to Thor tomorrow."

"No!"

"He will be a good husband, child. Think of that."

He turned to leave.

"I want to speak with Thor," she called after him.

"He is with his father, likely hearing the same news. I will send word that you wish to see him. But this is happening, child. You will see it is for the best."

With that, he left. Astrid wanted to scream, but she knew it would do no good. She threw herself across her bed and sobbed. If only Loki were there. Surely he would stop this and fight for her. But even if she admitted that she was in love with Loki, her father would still push her to Thor. Thor would be King, not Loki. In that moment, Astrid wished she could send thoughts to Loki, like he did to her. Then, maybe, she could have even a shred of hope.

Her tears had stopped some time before Thor finally knocked on her door. She straightened her dress, wiped her face, and called for him to enter. The smile on his face showed that he had indeed been told the news, but it faded when he saw her face.

"It does not take a very bright man to see that you are unhappy."

"It seems I have no choice in the matter."

Thor took Astrid's hands in his. "I had hoped that we would wed because you came to me willingly."

Astrid looked away with tears in her eyes, but Thor gently pulled her face back to look at him.

"I promise I will do everything in my power to make you happy, Astrid."

"I know you will try."

"And it would make me extremely happy to finally be able kiss more than just the hand of my betrothed."

Astrid could almost hear Loki in her head again, claiming her lips as his own. But Loki wasn't there, and Thor would soon be her husband.

She remained still as Thor leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. Astrid closed her eyes and imagined Loki. When Thor gently coaxed her lips apart, she obliged, and the kiss deepened. They kissed for several minutes before Thor pulled away. With his hands holding her face, he placed his forehead against Astrid's.

"I do love you, my sweet Astrid."

"I know."

That night, sleep eluded Astrid. She tossed and turned until she heard Loki's voice in her head, strong and clear, as she had every night that week.

_I love you, my darling_.

She turned her face into her pillow to stifle a scream, and then sobbed until sleep took her.


	4. Chapter 4

Astrid sat in her chair, staring lifelessly into a mirror as a maid did her hair. Her mother sat nearby, supervising, and rattling on about the honor of being Thor's wife. Astrid bit her tongue to stop herself from telling her mother that maybe she should marry Thor herself.

It was to be a small ceremony, with just their parents in attendance. The Allfather would marry them himself.

When the maid was done with Astrid's hair, her mother dismissed her.

"I will help her finish."

The maid curtsied and left the room.

"Astrid," her mother said. She pulled her chair closer and spoke in her usual soft voice. "I know this is not what you want."

"Then why do you not do something about it?"

Her mother's eyes became stern, and Astrid knew the warning.

"You know that my marriage to your father was arranged."

"Yes."

"And you know how much I love him now, and have for a long time."

"Yes."

"So, you know it is possible." Her mother paused before continuing. "Did I ever tell you that I was in love with another when I wed your father?"

Astrid turned in her seat, eyes wide. "No. You never told me that."

She nodded. "He was a member of my father's staff. Obviously, you can see where that was already doomed."

"What happened?"

"I married your father."

"Yes, but... what happened with the other?"

"He courted me, secretly, of course, until I was given word of my betrothal. We knew that we had to end it, and so we did."

"How could you do that so easily?"

"My sweet child, I never said it was easy. There were nights of crying, and denial, and me believing that my life was over."

Astrid turned back to the mirror as her mother continued.

"But your father... he loved me. I gave him a chance, even though I was given no choice, and we are happy together."

"He was very harsh with me yesterday," Astrid whispered. "I have never seen him that way. Not directed at me, at least."

"He just wants what is best for your future."

"What is best... would that not be love?"

"Not always, my dear." She brushed some hair from Astrid's face. "If I had not married your father, we may have never had you. And you are my best."

Astrid smiled, and tears pooled in her eyes.

"Thank you, Mama."

"Oh, now, crying will just make you puffy."

She dabbed at Astrid's eyes, and Astrid couldn't help but laugh.

"I should finish getting ready."

"That's my girl."

Astrid tried to smile as she stood facing Thor, but found it difficult. She tried to imagine Loki standing before her, but it broke her heart. At last, she gave in, took a deep breath, and let it happen as it would. She thought of her mother leaving behind her love to wed a man she didn't want. She knew that her mother now loved her father. She had seen nothing less growing up. Maybe, just maybe, she could love Thor one day. Not as a friend, but as a husband.

When the time came for them to kiss, Astrid let go. She was Thor's wife.

That night, servants began to move Astrid's things into Thor's chambers. She hadn't thought that far ahead, and Thor could see the worry on her face. He pulled her into a corner of the bed chamber and shut the door, away from prying ears.

"I will not ask you for intimacy tonight," he said. "I know that this was forced upon you, and I will be damned if I force myself on you in what should be a blissful joining."

"Thank you, Thor."

"I will wait, for as long as it takes, for you to seek out that intimacy of your own will... but until then, all I ask is that you share my bed each night. If for no other reason than my pride. What gossip would start if my new wife suddenly ordered all her things back into her old room?"

Thor grinned, and Astrid couldn't help but smirk. Thor motioned to the bed.

"It is more than large enough for two, with room to spare." He took her hands. "I promise to keep my distance until you are ready."

She nodded her agreement, and Thor kissed her softly.

"Thank you, my sweet Astrid."

For the next few days, Thor didn't leave Astrid's side. They walked the grounds hand-in-hand, talking as friends would. They took riding trips to the countryside each day.

Thor was true to his word, and he never pushed her for anything more than a kiss. Though his hands began to travel during those kisses, he was respectful.

Almost a week after their wedding, Thor and Astrid were walking through the gardens. They came to a bench, and Thor motioned for Astrid to sit. He took her hands in his.

"Astrid, I know this has not been easy on you, but I want you to know how happy I am. How happy you have made me. I know our marriage is not ideal, but..." Thor reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, then let his fingers graze her face. "You no longer pull back from my touch."

It was true. Astrid knew that to continue on with her insistence of not being touched or kissed would only make the situation worse. It would anger and hurt Thor, and would only leave her feeling constantly on guard and miserable.

There were times when she knew Thor wanted to kiss her more deeply. In those moments, she closed her eyes and pictured Loki. She knew that was the kind of kiss he was waiting for there in the garden. She leaned in a little to give him permission, then his lips crashed into hers. With one hand still touching her face, his other arm wrapped around her waist. Astrid imagined being in Loki's arms, and she wrapped her arms around Thor's shoulders. The image of Loki in her head was so clear that she heard him speak.

"Well, it looks like things have progressed in my absence."

It wasn't until Thor pulled away that Astrid realized Loki was really there. She looked into his eyes, and her face became a deep red. If Thor noticed, he surely thought it was just embarrassment at being caught in such an intimate moment.

"Brother! When did you return?"

"Only just now. I haven't even been to the palace yet."

She knew she was imagining it, but it felt like Loki's eyes never left her. She saw pain and anger there.

"Well," Thor said, "I doubt Father would be too upset if we shared the happy news with you ourselves."

"What news?"

Thor took Astrid's hand and she stood slowly, but kept her eyes down. She didn't want to see the look on Loki's face.

"Loki," Thor said, "meet your sister-in-law."

He motioned toward Astrid. She couldn't see Loki's face, but she heard his silence. She felt it all around her.

"I thought the ceremony was to be held after your coronation?"

"Our fathers decided to do a small one to make it official sooner. There will be a grand wedding after."

"Well, then, I am happy for you both! Since I was deprived of your wedding, may I hug the bride?"

"Of course!"

Loki wrapped his arms around Astrid and spoke in her mind.

_I need to talk to you. Come to my room after dinner. I will shield you._

"Congratulations, Astrid."

"Thank you."

The day moved slowly for Astrid. Yet the end of dinner came too soon. For all the wishing she had done for Loki, now she couldn't bear to face him. As they cleared the plates and everyone slipped into conversation, Astrid heard Loki.

_Tell Thor you are going for a ride, but head for my room once you are in the corridor. I will be there soon._

It wasn't odd for Astrid to go for a ride after dark. She loved to ride, and everyone knew she did so whenever she could.

She excused herself. Thor leaned in for a kiss before she stood. Astrid hesitated, but kissed him gently. Once in the corridor, she heard Loki tell her she was hidden from sight. She went to his chambers and slipped inside when she was sure no one was around. She paced inside his sitting room while she waited for him. He wouldn't be able to leave right away, or it might raise suspicion.

So she waited.

When Loki finally came into the room, he held his finger up to his lips and locked the door. Without so much as a glance at her, he walked into the bed chamber and held the door open for her to pass through. His eyes were on the floor. Once she was inside, Loki closed the door and looked up at her.

They stared at each other, neither speaking. Astrid wanted to jump into his arms and kiss him, but she was another man's wife now, and Loki had seemed so hurt before. She didn't want to make it worse.

"This is not the welcome I was expecting upon my return," Loki finally said.

"I'm sorry." Astrid fought back tears.

"Do you love him?"

"How could you ask me that?"

"You married him."

"I had no choice! You were not here. I did not know what to do. My father-"

"This kiss I interrupted seemed-"

"I was imagining you, Loki. He is my husband now. I could no longer reject his kiss."

Loki's eyes darkened, and his lips formed a tight, straight line.

"And, as your husband, have you accepted him where you rejected me?"

Astrid felt her stomach clench. "Thor has graciously given me time to accept our marriage before we consummate it."

"How sweet." Loki's voice dripped with contempt.

"What would you have me do, Loki? My father would have dragged me to the marriage altar kicking and screaming. I'm sure that is why they insisted on the private ceremony; to avoid a spectacle. So, tell me, what would you have me do!"

Her voice had steadily risen, and tears threatened to spill. Loki took a step forward.

"Tell me you love me," he whispered.

Astrid ran into his arms and her tears fell down her cheeks.

"I love you." She kissed his neck. "I love you so much. Only you."

Loki pulled her face to his and kissed her.

"Forgive me," she whispered against his lips.

"There is nothing to forgive, my love. I know you had no choice. I just cannot bear the thought of another man touching what is mine."

Astrid wiped her eyes. "But I am no longer yours."

"Like hell you're not."

Loki scooped her into his arms and kissed her hard. Astrid wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the intensity of the kiss, despite the warning in her head. What they were doing was dangerous, but her heart didn't care. Loki was the man she loved. He was the man she wanted.

Loki set her back on her feet beside the bed, and began to pull at the few laces on the back of her dress.

"Wait, Loki."

"Is something wrong?" Loki asked as he pulled away.

"I am supposed to be out on a ride."

"Yes."

"We do not have time for this. I do not want our first time together to be rushed; just a frenzy of passion."

Loki put a hand to her face. "Is that all this hesitation is?"

Astrid kissed him hard, but pulled away quick. "It is not a hesitation. I love only you. I want only you. But I want time to enjoy being with you. Not a tryst after dinner. Not this time."

"Very well," he said. "I will fix your lacing, and you can return to your husband. I shall think of some way for us to meet for a longer time."

He turned her, and straightened out her clothing. When she faced him again, she saw the sadness in his eyes.

"I love you," she whispered.

"I love you, my darling."

"Can you shield me from sight until I reach the stables?"

"What for?"

"I think I actually would like to ride. Just for a bit."

Loki nodded. "I can do that."

As Astrid approached the main gate of the stables she heard Thor's voice. Her pace slowed, but she didn't dare stop in case someone might see her hesitate. When she stepped inside, Thor turned around to her.

"Are you going somewhere?" She asked him.

"It would only be to look for you if I were. Where were you?"

She didn't hesitate. "I went for a walk first."

Thor went to her and kissed her forehead. "You should tell me these things. I was going to wait for you to return, and when your horse was still here I feared something had happened to you."

"I am fine."

"So I see."

"Care to join me on my ride?"

"I would love to."


	5. Chapter 5

The dream felt intensely real. Loki came to Astrid, and they made love. She felt his hands in places he had never touched, and his arms wrapped around her when they lay still after. His hand rubbed up and down her arm as it lay draped across his body. It was that sensation that woke her. That felt just a little too real.

Astrid's eyes slowly opened, and her surroundings came back to her. It was Thor's hand that rubbed her arm. It was his body she lay so close to with her arm over. She started to pull it off, but Thor gently grabbed her wrist.

"Please don't. You cannot imagine the joy I felt waking up to you this way." His hand raked through her hair, and his chest rose and fell with a deep sigh. "Though, I dare not think we ended up this way intentionally."

"I am sorry. I do not know how I-"

"You seemed to be having a fitful sleep. I felt you turn a few times, and when you arrived at this position I put my arm around you. You settled."

"I cannot deny that you have always been a comfort to me."

Thor shifted himself down and onto his side, but made sure to keep Astrid in his arms. He smiled at her before lowering his lips to her neck. Despite herself, Astrid moaned, which only encouraged Thor. She felt his tongue on her skin and she gripped his arm.

She was still caught somewhere in her dream of Loki. Her body still tingled with the sensation of his imagined touch, and Thor was reigniting it. His hand slid across her face, down her neck to her chest. He gently squeezed her breast pulling another moan from her.

_Good morning, my love_ \- she heard Loki in her head.

Her entire body froze, and she began to push at Thor's shoulder.

"Thor... stop."

He pulled back without hesitation. "Is something wrong?"

She stared into his eyes a moment, searching for an excuse.

"I... I am..."

"You are still not ready," he said softly.

Astrid shook her head. "I am sorry."

"You have no reason to be. In fact, I see this morning as progress. I will not give up, my sweet Astrid. I will win your heart."

He kissed her forehead and got out of bed. He quickly dressed and told Astrid he would see her in the dining hall for breakfast.

Astrid sat next to Thor at the table, and while they were alone he couldn't keep his hands, or his lips, to himself. He mouthed at Astrid's neck as he had done in the bed that morning. She closed her eyes and leaned into him. Anger rose up inside her that she enjoyed the feeling, yet she couldn't pull away.

"You two need to keep this behavior behind closed doors."

Astrid's eyes flew open to find Loki standing across the table. She wanted to fade out of sight; away from the guilt she felt under his gaze.

"Sorry, brother," Thor said, "but it is hard to keep your hands from a beautiful woman, is it not?"

"This is true."

Loki sat and they all ate and talked, though Astrid kept mostly quiet.

"Thor," Loki said, "I have a free day today, and I realize that I have not spent any time with my sister-in-law since before I was away. I was wondering if you would be wiling to part with her for the day."

"I suppose I have occupied most of her time these past few weeks. I have some things to tend to. Father asked just yesterday when I would be getting back to training." He looked at Astrid. "Is it all right with you?"

"Yes. Things have to get back to normal some time."

"Unfortunately, that is true. Very well, Loki. She is yours for the day."

"Excellent," Loki said with a grin. "How does a ride trough the country sound?"

"It sounds lovely."

"Very well. I will make sure the horses are ready. Join me at the stables in a few minutes?"

"I will be there."

Loki nodded and left the dining hall.

"I suppose I cannot keep you all to myself," Thor said.

"I suppose not."

"May I have a kiss to sustain me through the day?"

Astrid smiled and leaned in for a quick kiss, but Thor grabbed her waist and pulled her against him. His hand moved to her thigh and traveled over the light, flowing fabric of her dress. When his fingers brushed higher she pulled away.

"Thor..."

"Forgive me." Thor rested his forehead against Astrid's. "The longing to call you my wife in every way has clouded my vow of patience."

"You have been very patient, and I do love you for that."

Thor pulled back and looked into her eyes. "Then I shall continue in my patience."

Loki was waiting for Astrid outside of the stables. He was already mounted on his horse, and had the reins of hers in his hand. Astrid climbed up and he smiled at her.

"Shall we race?"

"Racing is not very ladylike," she said.

"Neither was your display with my brother at breakfast," he whispered so that only she could hear.

Astrid felt a rush of embarrassment, then anger settled in.

"Fine," she said as snapped her reins.

Her horse took off and Loki followed. His horse quickly overtook hers, and he made his way toward the forest that housed his hidden place. When they reached their tree, they slid from their horses. Neither bothered to tie them to the tree.

"How dare you!" Astrid said.

"How dare I? Do you have any idea what it is like to walk into a room and find your brother attached to the neck of the woman you love?"

"What was I to do?"

"Push him away!"

"I could not do that!"

"No? Because he is your husband?"

"That is exactly the reason!"

"It is a convenient reason."

Astrid wanted to scream, but a part of her still felt the guilt of enjoying the physical contact with Thor. She turned away from him to collect herself.

"Okay," she said softly, "this is getting us nowhere." She turned to face him again. "This could very well end whatever feelings you have for me... but I have to tell you this. It hurts me to think I am hiding something from you."

"You love him."

"No! Just... let me get this out."

Loki nodded and she took a deep breath.

"This morning, I woke up in Thor's arms. I tried to pull away, but he asked me not to, and he started kissing my neck and..."

"Did you stop him?"

"Eventually."

"Then what are you hiding?"

"The truth is that I was enjoying it."

Loki clenched both his fists and his jaw.

"But it is not that simple. Please, let me finish, and then you can get angry."

When Loki said nothing, she continued.

"I was having this incredible dream about you. We were together... intimately. It felt so real, and it was so amazing. And when Thor started kissing me I was still kind of feeling-"

Astrid stopped when she realized that Loki was laughing.

"What could possibly be funny about this?"

"Realizing that I am responsible for my own torment."

"What?"

"I am the cause of that dream."

"Yes, I know."

"No, darling. I put those images into your head. Not too differently than how I speak to you."

"You did what?"

"I wanted you to see how I imagined us together. I wanted to know that you were thinking about me." He took her hand in his and held it against his chest. "I had no idea the trouble it would cause. So, it seems I should be apologizing for driving you deeper into the arms of my brother."

"You are not solely at fault in this situation. Dream or no dream, I did-"

"Stop." Loki covered her mouth with his hand. "You have no idea the jealous rage that is coursing through me. If you agree to forgive, then so do I."

Astrid nodded. Loki removed his hand and wrapped his arms around Astrid's waist. For the first time, she looked around her. There was a large blanket laid open across the grass in the shade.

"When did you lay out the blanket?" she asked.

"I came out here before breakfast in hopes that I could get you alone. You asked for more time to enjoy us together. We have all day in a place where no one will find us."

Astrid shook her head and clutched Loki's tunic.

"I am miserable, Loki. I just want to be with you, out in the open. No sneaking around."

"We will, darling. Until then, we need to make the most of what time we have together."

Loki brushed a strand of hair from her face, then brushed it all back over her shoulder. His fingers trailed down her neck, and his eyes followed. He stared at the spot for a long while.

"His lips were here," he said finally.

"Loki-"

"Where else?"

"Do not do this to yourself."

"Where else were his lips?"

"No place else."

"Truly?"

"Truly."

Loki kissed the other side of her neck. "Where has he touched you?"

"Loki-"

"Where?"

Astrid took Loki's hand and placed it on her breast. She watched his jaw clench.

"Where else?"

She took his hand again and turned a bit as she placed it on the top of her thigh so that his fingers brushed the inside as Thor's had done.

"Did he touch-"

"No."

"You did not let me finish."

"You do not have to. I stopped him."

Loki led her onto the blanket and slowly knelt in front of her. He ran his hands up and down her thighs, and kissed her stomach. Astrid sucked in a breath and held it.

"Where would you like me to touch you?" Loki asked.

She knelt down in front of Loki.

"Everywhere."

Loki slowly drew her lips to his.

"Are you mine?"

"Yes."

"Do you belong to anyone else?"

"Only you."

Loki kissed her and lowered her to lie on her back. His hand traveled down to her legs and began to draw up the bottom of her dress. Once it was high enough, he reached beneath it and let his hand glide up the inside of her thigh until his fingers brushed over her center.

"No one else is to touch you here," he said into her mouth.

"No one else."

He slipped his hand into her undergarments, and his fingers explored her flesh. Her hips bucked at the sensation, and Loki smiled into the kiss. She gripped his arm as the heat built up inside of her.

She whined when he removed his hand and sat up.

"No worries, my darling. We need to get this dress off."

Astrid helped Loki remove her dress and undergarments, then he slowly removed his clothes while his eyes slid over her body. Loki lay on top of Astrid and ran a hand through her hair.

"You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met, in all the Nine Realms."

He pushed inside of her with a few gentle thrusts, each one sending a ripple of pleasure through Astrid. She wrapped her legs around his waist and met his thrusts. The sounds of nature mingled with moans and heavy breathing. The two stared into each other's eyes as they made love, until Loki's rhythm began to falter. He lowered his head and drew one of her nipples into his mouth. When Astrid moaned, Loki lost all sense of control. He thrust harder and faster until Astrid's whole body shook, and her legs clamped tighter around him, and he soon was trembling with her.

He didn't move for a long while. They lay there, joined together, kissing through their heavy breathing. Hands roamed and groped.

When Loki finally rolled onto his back he pulled Astrid close to his side.

"I love you, Loki."

"I love you, my darling."


	6. Chapter 6

Loki and Astrid made love over and over there in their hidden place until the sun went down, and they knew they had to return to the palace. Thor would be waiting. That fact hung heavy around them as they watched the sunset. Loki lay on his back with Astrid curled up against him. Her head rested against his shoulder as his arm circled around her. Her legs tangled with his. Nothing but Loki's tunic covered them, draped across their hips to keep away the coolness in the air. They became quiet, neither of them wanting to say what needed to be said.

When Loki felt a wetness on his skin he turned his head and lifted Astrid's face.

"Why the tears, darling?"

"You know why. Today was so wonderful, and now I have to go back to-"

Loki put two firm fingers to her lips. "Not his name. Not while we are together like this."

Astrid nodded and continued when Loki removed his fingers. "It does not change the fact that I have to return and pretend that I am not in love with you."

"I will find ways to be with you."

"I doubt we will get an opportunity like today any time soon."

"I believe you are right."

Astrid propped herself up on her elbow. "How do we do this?"

"Our times together will be short. We will have to make the most of them."

"I just see no way for this to work without us getting caught."

"Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do."

"Then worry no more. I will make sure we are together."

Loki rolled Astrid onto her back and buried his face between her breasts. He inhaled deeply and kissed his way up her neck to her lips before he stared into her eyes.

"I have centuries left to live," he said, "and not one year is worth living if I cannot have you."

Astrid smiled. "You were willing to keep your love quiet when you thought I was in love with him."

"Because I thought you would be happy. That was all I wanted. Now that I know you love me as I love you, I will never let you go. As long as you love me, you are mine. No one else's. I was not kidding about the jealousy I feel for you."

"I love no one but you, Loki."

"I know, darling. I just may need a reminder when I see you... pretending with him."

"Just tell me how to remind you, and I will."

He kissed her gently, then pulled away with a sigh.

"We should go."

Astrid whimpered, but Loki stood before she could protest further. He handed Astrid her dress before he dressed himself. He left the blanket to remove later. After one last, lingering kiss they climbed onto their horses and rode back to the palace.

They arrived in time for dinner. Astrid took her place beside Thor, who leaned in for a kiss. Loki, seeing the exchange from where he stopped to speak with one of Thor's warrior friends, decided to pass on the meal. He walked past the table toward the corridor, and almost didn't stop when Thor called after him.

"Are you not joining us, brother?"

"Not tonight. It's back to training tomorrow, so I intend to enjoy these last few hours of rest in quiet solitude. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Loki," Astrid said. "Thank you for the lovely day."

Loki smiled and gave a slight bow. "Quite welcome."

That night, to avoid raising any suspicion, Astrid snuggled against Thor in bed. His deep, contented sigh was hard to ignore. Guilt ran through her. She never asked to be married to Thor, and still she felt like she was betraying him.

As horrible as that made her feel, she knew the one person she couldn't betray was Loki. So, she made sure that Thor kept his hands in respectable places. If Thor objected, he kept it to himself.

Loki kept his distance over the next few days. Between training and other duties he was busy, and Astrid had her hands full with meetings that Frigga insisted she attend. They barely spoke more than a hello as they passed each other.

When the ball was announced, Loki knew it would be an opportunity. As people ate and drank, Loki slipped away from the crowd and down the corridor. He knew there would be guards along the way because of the party, so he cloaked himself, making his way to his chambers, unseen.

Astrid heard his voice in her head. - _Come to me, darling_.

Loki had managed to speak with her before the ball, so she knew exactly where to go. She glanced toward Thor, who was across the room. She politely ended her conversation with a foreign dignitary, and cautiously slipped down the corridor. Loki had promised to blind the guards to her passing, but she felt exposed as she walked right by them. They never even glanced her way.

The moment she slipped into Loki's room, he grabbed her arm and pulled her against him into a kiss. He backed her further into the room, then against the wall. His breathing was already harsh with want. He rolled his hips against hers. Astrid gasped into his mouth, and Loki growled.

He broke the kiss as he fumbled with the ties of his pants, but he kept his face close to hers, kissing her cheeks.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you."

Astrid lifted the skirt of her dress as Loki pulled his pants down enough to free himself. He lifted her, and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he pushed into her.

Loki stilled, barely grinding his hips against hers as he pressed her back against the wall. He remembered her words about their love turning into frenzied, lust-filled trysts, and forced himself to slow down and savor the moment. He brushed the tips of his fingers through the hair at her temple and kissed her, soft and slow. Astrid wrapped her arms around his shoulders. One of her hands was at his neck, raking her fingers through his hair.

"Loki," she said against his lips.

"Yes, my love?"

"Take me."

He pulled his hips back, then trust them gently forward. The motion pulled a moan from Astrid.

"Like this, darling?"

"Yes."

He repeated the movement.

"We fit together so perfectly," he whispered.

"Perfect."

Loki began to move faster, and Astrid moaned. Loki's hand traveled down her body, stopping for a moment to palm and squeeze her breast before gripping her bare thigh. His fingers dug into her flesh as his hips ground into her.

Loki pulled her earlobe between his teeth and groaned into her ear. "You are mine."

"Yours... I am yours."

Loki let out a guttural scream into Astrid's neck as she tightened around him and pulled him over the edge with her. Her legs fell limp, and Loki placed her back on her feet, though he held her tight around her waist. They kissed deeply, and Astrid's hands found Loki's bare bottom.

"It is truly a shame you have to cover your perfect body," she said with a smile.

"The same could be said of you."

"Though I would want no one else to see it." She squeezed his rear before her hand fell away, and Loki pulled up his pants. "You are not the only one who knows jealousy," she said.

"When have you ever had cause to be jealous?"

"Have you not seen the way women look at you? The young, handsome Prince with the sharp mind and the silver tongue? They would fall at your feet if you asked them to."

"I see no woman but you. I never have."

With a hand to his face, Astrid placed a light kiss to Loki's lips.

"I love you," she said. "More than you could possibly imagine."

Loki smiled and righted the fabric of Astrid's dress.

"We need to get back," he said. "You go back the way you came. I will shield you through the corridors. I will go another way to the library. Someone will eventually look for me and find me there alone."

Back in the ballroom, Astrid found Thor and hooked her hand over his arm.

"There you are!" Thor put his hand on hers. "I was beginning to think you abandoned me."

"I just stepped out for a moment, but I've been mingling, as Frigga is teaching me."

"Then you have an excellent teacher."

"I have no doubts there. I love your mother."

Just before the party ended, Astrid saw Loki walking back into the room. His eyes found hers, and he smiled.

_I love you, darling_. -she heard in her head.


	7. Chapter 7

Several weeks passed. Loki and Astrid stole whatever moments they could. Sometimes they made love, sometimes it was only long enough to kiss. It didn't matter how long they were together, Astrid anticipated each moment.

The downside through all of it was that she had to make sure that Thor never became suspicious. She tried to avoid physical contact when Loki was around, but Thor was usually hands-on.

One night as they lay in bed, Thor wrapped his arm around her waist from behind and kissed her neck.

"Thor, we need sleep."

"Will you never return my affections?"

"I am tired. Can we not have this discussion now?"

"It is the only time I am alone with you lately. I feel like we have taken a step back. Have I done something to upset you?"

"No."

"Then, what? You withdraw from my kisses. You remove my hand when I try to touch you."

"You know I am not ready."

"But you were trying. You let me kiss you, hold you. Now..."

His voice trailed off with a sigh.

"I have asked you before, but it is worth asking again. Do you love another?"

"If I said that I do, would it change anything?"

"No. You are my wife."

"Then why bother to ask such a question?"

"You are cross."

"I am tired."

Thor leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"Then, sleep, my love."

He turned so that his back was to her, and she soon heard his gentle snoring. Astrid couldn't fall asleep, so she went to the library to sit and read for a while.

She found Loki there, reading in one of the oversized chairs. He looked up as she walked toward him and he smiled.

"Astrid, darling-"

He stopped talking when Astrid straddled him and slammed her lips against his. Without hesitation, he threw his book to the floor and wrapped his arms around her.

"This is an unexpected pleasure," he said when they broke for air.

"Very much."

Astrid pulled at the ties on Loki's pants. Loki ran his hands through her hair, then moved to untie the laces at the bosom of her night dress. When her breasts were unveiled, Loki latched his lips onto one of them and palmed the other. He groaned against her flesh when her hand finally wrapped around his freed length.

They worked each other that way, with hands and lips, until Astrid couldn't take it anymore. She lowered herself onto his length and began to rock back and forth. Loki groaned and stared at their hips joining before his eyes connected with hers.

Astrid kissed his neck before their eyes connected again.

"Make me forget everything but you," she whispered.

Loki cupped her face in his hands. "You will have to be quiet. We don't want to draw attention to ourselves."

"I will do my best, but I make no promises."

Astrid smiled, and it made Loki grin. He planted his feet flat on the floor and shifted Astrid in his lap so he could better grip her hips. He thrust up into her and she fought back a loud moan.

She met each thrust by pushing herself down onto him, driving him deeper. A cry slipped past Astrid's lips, and Loki clamped a hand over her mouth. She whimpered into his palm as he pounded into her. Loki clenched his jaw to stop the loud noise that wanted to escape.

Astrid spasmed around Loki as the pleasure washed over her, still trying to meet his thrusts until he joined her and they both went limp. His hands roamed over her back while she kissed his neck.

He pulled her back and kissed her forehead before relacing her gown. She returned the favor by tying his pants.

"Did you know I was here?" Loki asked.

"No. I could not sleep. I was coming to read."

"Happy coincidence," he said with a smile.

"Very happy."

She lay against him and buried her face in his neck.

"I love you," she said with a sigh.

"I love you, my darling."

"Take me away from here."

"I know that is not what you truly want. You would miss your parents, and you would carry guilt over him."

"I am only happy in your arms. Every other moment is a burden."

"Then let us not speak of it while we are together."

"What happened to your plan?"

"It is forming. A few minor details to work out."

"And we will be together?"

"If all goes accordingly."

Astrid ran a hand down his chest.

"Just hold me for a while."

"Gladly," he said as he wrapped his arms tighter around her.

They stayed there for a long while before they kissed goodnight.

Astrid slipped back into bed, and drifted to sleep with the feel of Loki all over her.

Several days passed, and Thor seemed to be giving Astrid space again. He didn't try to cuddle her at night, and his kisses only ever met her cheek. She was relieved at the change, until the night he arrived back at their room drunk after a late night out.

Astrid was lying in bed when Thor slammed the door closed. She sat up with a start.

"You will wake the entire wing of the palace," he said.

"I only wanted to wake you." He leaned over and kissed her on the lips.

"I was already awake. And you are drunk."

"Just a little."

Thor pushed her back to lie on the bed and lay himself on top of her as he kissed her neck.

"What are you doing?" She pushed at his shoulders.

"Finally making love to my wife."

"Not like this," she said, still shoving.

Thor pulled back. "No. You are right." He stood and pulled her with him.

"Let me go!"

Thor pulled her toward a chair. He sat down and pulled her into his lap so that she straddled him. One arm held her tight around her waist as his other hand unlaced the bosom of her gown. She slapped at his shoulders and hands.

"Stop!"

"What? Is this not how you like it? Is this not how you fucked my brother?"

Astrid froze and Thor grabbed her wrists. She stared at him, not quite registering the words he had spoken.

"Are you insane?" she finally asked.

"I followed you to the library that night. You seemed genuinely surprised to find him there, so I know the meeting was not planned. Yet you went to him as a lover you had been to before, and he accepted you the same."

"You watched us?"

"I watched just long enough to know that my brother knows my wife more intimately than I know her."

Thor stood, and Astrid fell to the floor. He paced with his fists clenched.

"You rejected my affections, your husband, and let my brother seduce you."

"That is not how it happened."

"You left my bed to be with him."

"No."

"How many times?"

"Would you listen? Loki and I-"

"Do not dare speak his name to me! I saw you with my own eyes. Were it not for the scandal I would bring this betrayal before the Allfather."

Astrid finally stood. "What will you do?"

"I will do nothing. This embarrassment will remain secret. You will tell him it is over."

"What you are asking-"

"I am not asking." He walked toward the door, but stopped and turned back to her. "And I suppose I will do something. I will make sure you are never alone with him again. And on the night of my coronation, I will have you as my wife. I have lost my patience, and you have lost your right to refuse me."

He left the room and slammed the door behind him. Astrid sat on the edge of the bed and cried. From the day she confessed her love to Loki her life had taken a bad turn, and it was just getting worse. She quickly tightened the laces of her dress, then ran from the room. She went straight for Loki's chambers, and was only slightly surprised to find Thor inside. He and Loki stood toe-to-toe, and they both looked at her when she entered.

"I should have known you would run to him," Thor said.

"Of course she came to me, you giant oaf!" Loki bit back.

"You told me to tell him," Astrid added.

"And you just could not wait. Well, I decided to confront the traitor myself."

"Thor," Astrid said, "you have this all wrong. Loki and I-"

"Do not tell me what I saw! I know what I saw!"

"Yes, you saw it, but you are wrong about the intentions! Neither of us wanted to betray you."

Thor pointed a finger in Loki's face. "You stay away from her. Am I clear? She will be under constant guard. You will never have one second of her alone."

He grabbed Astrid's arm and pulled her behind him as he stormed out, but Loki grabbed her other arm to stop him.

"You cannot man handle her like you do everything else. She is not your property."

Thor shoved Loki away from her. "Touch her again, and my first act as King will be to banish you to a barren realm."

Loki made a move to throw a punch, but Astrid yelled for him to stop.

"No, Loki. Let me go."

Loki relaxed his arm and stared at Thor.

"You are lucky she holds sway over me."

Thor took Astrid's hand and pulled her from the room. Loki ran a hand through his hair. The anger inside of him built and mixed with the jealousy and a feeling of helplessness until he threw the punch he wanted to throw at Thor. His magic would repair the hole in the door tomorrow.


	8. Chapter 8

Loki went two weeks without seeing Astrid. Thor carried out his threat and had her under constant guard. When she was dining, riding, or just walking through the gardens, a guard was there. Usually more than one. Loki knew he couldn't risk seeing her so soon after they were caught. Thor would be expecting it.

The only communication they had was through Loki's telepathy. He reminded her that he loved her, and that he knew she loved him in return. He told her they would be together; to be patient. He only wished she could speak back.

As Thor's coronation drew near, Astrid confined herself to her chambers. Even with Loki speaking to her, she felt alone. The entire situation seemed hopeless.

The morning before the ceremony, Thor reminded Astrid that she would fulfill her wifely duties the following night.

Thor would be in conference all day with the Allfather, in preparation for the coronation. Loki took that as an opportunity to see Astrid. He projected an image of himself past several guards, making it appear as if he had left the palace. After some time passed, he shifted into the form of Thor and strode through the corridors to Astrid's chambers. The guards bowed as he entered the room. Inside the bedroom, Astrid sat up in bed.

"You said you would let me have today alone."

Thor's image faded to reveal Loki as he put a finger to his lips. Astrid threw back the covers and ran to Loki's arms. She kissed his face and neck as he whispered; his voice the calm and soothing balm she needed.

"I am here, darling. It will be all right."

"I love you, so much."

"I love you, too."

Loki backed her toward the bed and gently lay her down. Despite the fact that Thor could return to his bedroom at any moment, his promise to leave Astrid alone for the day gave them hope that he wouldn't. They would take their time together. Loki's hand slipped beneath her dress and traveled across her thigh and hip. He squeezed her rear before pulling her up to sit. His hands pulled at the lacing on the back of her dress as they kissed, until it was loose enough to fall from her shoulders. Astrid removed her arms, and the dress pooled at her waist. Loki lay her back once more, then pulled the dress down and off. Astrid lay naked before him. She made no move to cover herself out of modesty. She was his to consume. His eyes roamed her body as he undressed and crawled back over her. He kissed her neck and traveled down until his lips reached her thighs. He kissed inward, and felt her body stiffen as he raised her legs onto his shoulders.

"Relax, darling," he said before he kissed the inside of each thigh. "Let this silver tongue work its magic."

Astrid closed her eyes and moaned. Loki chuckled, then covered her with his mouth, probing with his tongue. Astrid writhed beneath him. Her hands fisted his hair as she tried to push herself against his mouth, but he held her down with an arm across her hips.

He moaned against her flesh, and she gasped at the vibration. Her breath came faster and more ragged as she neared her peak.

"Loki... Loki..."

He sucked the little bundle of nerves into his mouth and rolled his tongue around it, and Astrid broke. Her back arched, and Loki removed his arm from her hips.

He released her from his mouth as her hips fell back to the bed. He kissed her thighs, and she shivered. Loki continued his path of kisses upward, stopping at her breasts for just a moment before capturing her lips.

Astrid pulled him down until she felt the weight of him on top of her. She couldn't ignore the large hardness she felt pressed between the two of them.

"Loki?"

"Yes, my love."

"Your tongue is a treasure."

Loki laughed and buried his face in Astrid's neck.

"Ah, my darling," Loki sighed. "I would love to spend every second of the day pleasuring you."

"Would no one pleasure you?"

Loki reached down and guided himself into Astrid.

"That is what this is for," Loki whispered.

Loki lowered his head and licked at the dip at the base of Astrid's throat. She moaned and ran her hands over his back and shoulders.

He used every ounce of control he had to keep a slow and steady pace, determined to push Astrid to the edge again. Lips and hands roamed as they made love, and the moment Astrid's body spasmed, Loki let go.

He rolled them over so that Astrid was lying on top of him. They kissed for a while, and then Astrid began trailing her lips down his chest and stomach. Loki knew she headed below his waist as repayment, but he pulled her back up to his lips.

"As much as I would love to get this going again, we should not linger any longer than we have."

Astrid kissed his neck. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around her.

"Whatever happens tomorrow," Loki said as he ran a hand through her hair, "remember that I love you."

"I love you, too," she said, her face still buried in his neck.

"I have never been happier than I am with you in my arms."

The throne room was packed with citizens from all over Asgard. Thor, in all his glory, passed down the aisle made clear among the sea of people. He played to the crowd, raising his hands and shouting with joy, until he reached the steps of the throne. Frigga and Loki stood to one side. Astrid and the warriors stood on the other.

Astrid dared a glance at Loki. His face was down, with a sour expression. She feared that his plan had fallen through. Loki was watching his brother become King. His celebration prize? The woman Loki loved. Herself. She tried to fight the tears that filled her eyes. This should be a happy occasion. One of her best friends was being crowned as the ruler of Asgard. But that friendship was gone. If he could honestly force her to be with him when she told him repeatedly that she didn't want to be, and now that he knew that she didn't love him, but loved Loki... what kind of friendship was that?

To the horror of her parents in the audience, Astrid quickly went behind the throne as Odin began his speech. She made her way to Frigga, who eyed her with curiosity, if not worry.

"My Queen, I must speak with you quickly."

"Astrid," Loki whispered, "what are you doing?"

"Taking control." She turned her attention back to Frigga. "I know the disrespect it would show if I were to stop this ceremony. I need you to stop the Allfather."

"Astrid," Loki whispered, but his voice was harsh.

"Please," she said, ignoring him.

"What is wrong, child?"

"I am not--"

"Frost giants."

At those words, uttered softly by Odin, every eye around the thrown looked to him. The room went quiet as Odin quickly moved toward the door. Thor and Loki were at his heels.

Astrid knew better than to follow. She felt Frigga's hand on her arm.

"Finish what you were saying, dear."

"It... does not seem important at the moment."

"Will it be important again when the coronation continues? Will you still want me to stop it?"

Astrid almost stared into Frigga's eyes. She hadn't lied to Thor about loving his mother. Astrid always felt comfortable with her, never intimidated.

"Yes, I will."

Frigga led Astrid into a private room behind the throne. "Then continue."

Astrid took a breath. "I do not love Thor."

"Yes, you have expressed that."

"I love Loki... and he loves me."

"Is this a new development?"

"No, My Queen."

"I see." She took Astrid's hand. "Why did neither of you say anything?"

"Loki thought, because of my parents, that it would not matter. He thought we would be kept apart, and I do not think he was wrong."

"You underestimate your parents. The both of you."

"I estimate my father perfectly."

"But now you are married to Thor."

Astrid chose her words carefully. "Only by ceremony."

"Why come to me, now, child?"

"Because... Once Thor is King, he expects... I must..."

Frigga put her hand to Astrid's face. "I am sure Thor would understand."

"He did, at first, but he discovered Loki and I in a private moment, and he feels betrayed. He would not let me explain that I loved Loki before our marriage. We have made an awful mess of things. He has kept us apart the last few weeks."

"I thought he seemed different. I assumed it was the pressure of becoming King, but this makes everything clearer."

"Will you speak with the Allfather?"

"Is there no chance you will love Thor?"

"None."

"And you truly love Loki?"

"With everything that I am."

Frigga stared at Astrid, then nodded. "I will speak with him."

Astrid almost laughed with relief. Frigga hugged her and held her a moment.

"You know I think of you as my own daughter. You can always come to me."

"Thank you."

When they left the room, Astrid's parents were waiting right outside. Her father eyed her.

"What is the matter?" he asked.

"Nothing to concern yourself over," Frigga said. "Odin will take care of it."

"I am sorry, My Queen, but I meant with my daughter."

"So did I."

Odin was soon back in the throne room. An announcement was made that the coronation was to be postponed. As the crowd dispersed, he approached Frigga. Astrid made a move to leave, but Frigga held her arm.

"Your son," Odin said to Frigga, "is still an immature child. A warrior, not a king."

"How long will you postpone?"

"I am unsure."

"I have some news that may help you decide," Frigga said as she looked to Astrid. "Tell him."

After a deep breath, Astrid told Odin everything she had told to Frigga. Unlike Frigga, Odin listened without comment until she was finished.

"It seems we are surrounded by children," he said. "Do you and Loki realize what your secret could have cost?"

"I believe Loki thought he could fix it sooner, and we surely did not expect such a quick wedding, My King. We never intended to let it get that far."

Astrid spoke with tears in her eyes. Odin sighed before glancing at his wife. "You are more in tune with matters of the heart. Your advice?"

"I think you know."

He nodded. "I believe I do." Odin looked at Astrid, who was staring at Odin's feet. "Henceforth, the marriage of Thor and Astrid is annulled, and the betrothal is broken. You are free to be with whomever you choose."

Tears filled Astrid's eyes. "Thank you. My King! Thank you, so much!"

Odin waved her off with a nod, and she ran from the room to find Loki.


	9. Chapter 9

Astrid searched the palace for Loki, but couldn't find him. It wasn't until she entered the dining hall and saw the overturned table that she began to worry. Servants were cleaning the mess.

"What happened here?" she asked.

One of the head servants approached her and spoke softly.

"Prince Thor was angry. It seems he took out his frustration on the table."

She knew he was only telling her this because he believed her to still be Thor's wife.

"Was anyone with him?"

"Prince Loki and a few warriors, Miss."

"Where have they gone?"

"I couldn't say, Miss."

Astrid nodded. "Thank you."

He gave a slight bow, and returned to his work.

As Astrid left the room, an image of a dark, barren land filled her mind. She heard Loki's voice.

_Get the Allfather. We are in Jotunheim. Trouble._

The image faded and Astrid ran back to the throne room. She burst through the doors and ran closer than she should have before taking a knee. A guard was near her in an instant, but stopped as Odin stood.

"Child, you have tested my generosity once today. What is the meaning of this?"

"Your sons are in Jotunheim and need help." Astrid looked to Frigga. "Loki sent me a message."

"Thor," Odin mumbled under his breath. "Get my horse!"

Astrid tried to follow him out of the room, but she heard Frigga's voice in her head.

_Stay here, dear._

She watched Odin leave and felt Frigga's hand on her shoulder a moment later.

"I am worried about him," Astrid said. "Why would Thor bring Loki to Jotunheim?"

"We will get our answers when they return."

Astrid went to the balcony of the throne room, which looked out over Asgard. She would see them return. At first she saw only the warriors, and one of them looked hurt. Her heart sunk. She waited until she finally saw Odin, with Loki close behind.

She ran as fast as she could to the entry. Loki was barely off of his horse when she threw herself into his arms. He handed the reins of his horse to a stable boy, then wrapped his arms around her.

"I am fine, darling."

Astrid waited until they were alone.

"What happened?"

Loki sighed and pulled away, but took her hand. "Let's go to my chambers and talk."

Once inside Loki's chambers, Astrid kissed him. She noticed he seemed rigid at first, but he melted into her and soon returned her kiss.

"What's wrong, my love?"

Loki rested his forehead against hers for a moment before pulling away and walking toward his balcony.

"Father banished Thor."

"What?"

"He saved us in Jotunheim, and they had a terrible argument once we returned. Father stripped him of his power, and banished him."

"To where?"

"Midgard, I think."

"Loki, this is awful."

"I know, darling. I never meant for this."

Astrid looked up and stared at Loki's back.

"What do you mean you never meant this?"

Loki shoulders fell with his sigh. "I allowed the frost giants in."

"What?"

Loki turned to her. "It was a way to stop the wedding. I know how Thor hates them. I knew he would want to get revenge, but I did not think he would follow through. I was just trying to make father see that Thor does not deserve the crown... or you."

"It's treason," she whispered.

"No one knows it was me. Not even the frost giants."

"Why are you telling me this?"

Loki took her hands in his.

"Because I want you to understand. I want you to know what I am willing to do for you, my love. And I want you to know here and now that I never meant for it to turn out this way. Please, believe me."

Astrid knew he was telling the truth. She pulled him into her arms, and felt a bit of the tension leave his body.

"I believe you."

"I need to check on the others. Will you wait here for me?"

"Of course."

Loki placed a gentle kiss to her lips and left the room. Astrid lay on his bed and waited for him to come back, but hours passed and he hadn't returned, so she went looking for him. It didn't take her long to overhear the news. Odin had fallen into Odinsleep. She waited outside of the chamber that housed Odin during that time. When Loki finally emerged his eyes met hers, but he quickly looked down as he walked away.

"Loki!"

He stopped and turned to face her, but his eyes remained downcast.

"What?" he asked.

"I heard about your father. What can I do?"

"Nothing."

Loki walked away, but Astrid ran to catch up with him.

"Something's wrong. I know you."

"Everything is wrong."

"Not everything."

She took his hand, and he slowed to a stop. He stared at their joined hands before he pulled away.

"Everything."

"How can you say that? After all we have been through to be together? Just this evening you kissed me and asked me to wait for you."

"And now I am letting you go."

He walked away, but Astrid grabbed his arm.

"Unhand me."

"No! I do not understand. Something happened. What is it?"

_You will hate me_ \- she heard in her head.

"I will never hate you," she whispered.

His eyes locked onto hers. "I did not mean for you to hear that."

"Some part of you must have wanted me to hear it. Please, Loki. Tell me what has happened."

Loki took a deep breath, and let it out in a sigh. "Come with me."

Astrid followed Loki to the Vault. He wouldn't look at her the entire way. Once they were alone inside, Loki spoke.

"This is where father collapsed into the Odinsleep."

"You were with him?"

"He found me here, and we were having an argument of sorts."

"What about?"

"My true parentage."

"What?"

"I am not the son of Odin or Frigga."

He walked down the steps with a quick gait, and Astrid tried to keep up.

"I don't understand."

"When I was on Jotunheim, a frost giant grabbed my arm, and held it. It should have destroyed my arm, but it did nothing. It was as if I am immune to their touch."

Loki finally stopped at the end of the long walkway, in front of the Casket taken by Odin from the Jotuns. He picked it up.

"After I left you, I came here. This is where Odin found me."

Loki turned to face Astrid, and she watched as his skin changed to the look of a frost giant. Even his eyes changed color. She stared, mouth agape, eyes wide.

"And this is how he found me," Loki added. "He had no choice but to tell me the truth, and now you have forced me to show you. I am a frost giant... a monster."

"No," Astrid whispered as she took a step back.

"You already cower from me."

"I am not-"

"Do not lie to me!" Loki let go of the casket and waved his hands. It was magically back on its pedestal. "You want to pretend you are not afraid of me?"

"I will never be afraid of you."

Loki was beginning to fade back into his normal appearance, but Astrid put a hand to his face before it changed back completely. She took his Jotun hand and held it in hers with her fingers laced through his.

"You are still my Loki. Finding out where you came from does not change who you are."

"Yes, it does. I am not an Asgardian. I am Jotun."

Loki's appearance had fully returned.

"What did your father say?"

"That I am his son."

"And Frigga? Did you speak with her?"

Loki nodded.

"What did she say?" Astrid asked.

Tears welled up in Loki's eyes. "That I am their son, and they love me."

"They knew from the beginning where you came from, and they raised you as their own."

"And what about you?"

"I admit that it is a shock, especially the way you showed me, but I love you, Loki. As long as you are still the same man in here," she said as she laid a hand on his chest, "that love will not fade."

"But I am not who you thought I was."

"Do you wish to be a Jotun now?"

"What? No."

"Is your loyalty still to Asgard?"

He hesitated. "Yes, but..."

"But what?"

"They lied to me."

"So you would never feel like an outcast. Loki, do not let your anger cloud the fact that you are so loved."

Loki put his hand over hers on his chest, and he pulled it to his mouth. He kissed the palm of her hand.

"With father in Odinsleep, and Thor being banished, I have been made King."

"King?"

"Yes, my love."

Astrid smiled. "You can bring Thor back. End his banishment."

He shook his head. "Thor has been stripped of his power. Mother said that Father always has a reason for the things he does. Besides, I have a plan to prove myself. To my father, to Thor... to you."

"You have nothing to prove to anyone. Least of all to me."

"I want to prove that I am fit to be King. Once Thor returns, I likely won't be, but I want everyone to see that I have it in me to rule."

"Do you not see that this is exactly the kind of thinking that got Thor banished?"

"It is not the same."

"Yes, it is. Darling, do not instigate anything. Keep Asgard on the defensive in case the Jotuns attack, and keep the people calm."

"The Jotuns could never get in without my help."

"Good. My love, I do not care if you are King, Prince, or just Loki... as long as I have you. Guard the throne as King until Odin awakes, and he will be well pleased with you."

Loki wrapped his arms around Astrid's waist and rested his forehead against hers.

"Do you truly not care that I am Jotun?"

"I care only that when I am with you, my pulse races, and I feel loved and alive."

Loki's lips brushed against Astrid's before he deepened the kiss. Her hands sank into his hair and held him close.

"I wish we were married, so you could be my Queen."

Astrid pulled back to looked into his eyes, her own eyes slightly widened by surprise.

"When Father awakens, will you become my wife?"

Astrid smiled and cradled Loki's face in her hands.

"I want nothing more."


	10. Chapter 10

Loki took Astrid's hand as they walked to the throne room. As he ascended the steps, she slipped her hand from his and bowed. When Loki turned to take his seat, he saw her and walked back down the steps.

"My darling, you are never to bow to me."

He pulled her upright.

"But you are my King."

"And you are my love. I would sooner kiss your feet than have you bow to me."

He led her up the steps, and smiled as he sat on the throne. His hands ran over the sides of it.

"How does it feel?" Astrid said.

"Wonderful."

Loki pulled her into his lap and cradled her in his arms. She laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Have you ever imagined," he whispered in her ear, "what it would be like to make love on this very throne?"

"We would give the guards an eye-full."

"I could send them away."

"And if someone were to walk in?"

"Hmmm... close your eyes."

Astrid squinted her eyes at him, but Loki just smiled.

"Trust me."

She closed her eyes with a sigh, and soon felt Loki's hand on her breast. Her eyes flew open, but Loki wasn't touching her. He sat back on the throne with a smirk on his lips.

"Trust me," he said.

She closed her eyes, and the sensation of his hand on her breast returned, followed by an image of her straddling his lap and lowering herself onto him. With her eyes still closed, she gripped Loki's tunic. Her body shivered as it connected with his in her vision.

"Loki," she whispered.

"I have you," he said as he pulled her against him.

Astrid buried her face in Loki's neck, but kept her eyes closed. The Loki in her vision began to thrust into her.

"I feel you," she whispered.

"Yes, my love."

"Do you feel me?"

"Every inch." His breath became ragged against her ear. "Which is why I must stop."

The vision disappeared and Astrid opened her eyes. Her hand still fisted his tunic.

"Why?"

"That was more intense than even I anticipated. To hold you this way, so close. The connection was too strong."

Astrid caressed his face.

"I love you."

Loki smiled, and kissed the top of her head.

"As much as I would love to keep you here, there may be people who wish to see me, and business to attend."

Astrid groaned. "I suppose I cannot keep the King to myself."

"It is a downside to the throne."

She slipped from his lap and went to his side, taking his hand in hers.

"May I stand at your side?"

"I fear you will be most bored. Would you not rather go riding?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?" she asked with a grin.

"I must admit that you would be a distraction. A most welcome one, but a distraction nonetheless."

He kissed her hand, and they were smiling at each other when the warriors entered. They could not hide their surprise at seeing Loki on the throne, and Astrid saw Sif's gaze linger on her and Loki's joined hands before meeting her eyes.

After they were told Loki was King, the warriors bowed with hesitation as Loki stood before them. Sif asked that he put an end to Thor's banishment, but Loki refused.

"My first act as King cannot be to undo the Allfather's last. Perhaps if father does not awaken soon, I will consider, but I am hoping for Odin's expedient return."

Sif's eyes shifted back and forth between Loki and Astrid as one of the other warriors pleaded with Loki.

"We're finished," Loki said.

When the warriors were gone, Loki returned to the throne and took Astrid's hand again.

"They suspect us of some treachery," she said. "Did you see the way she was looking at me?"

"Yes, darling. They likely do not know you are no longer Thor's wife. Me on the throne, and you at my side, I would be surprised if they were not suspicious."

"But we have done nothing wrong. Rule falls to you, and I am free."

"No need to convince me, Astrid," he chuckled. "I know the truth."

"Of course," she said with a sigh. "I just meant that-"

"I know what you meant," Loki said as he stood, "and I agree. You were right in your advice to me. I will fill the void, guard the throne, protect the realms as needed, and await Odin's awakening. No one can think me in the wrong if I act as what I am, an interim King. And your presence at my side will come to light as more than proper."

He kissed her forehead, then her lips.

"But, perhaps for now, you should not be seen so much at the throne. People will talk. Let's not give them reason."

Astrid nodded, and dipped her head. "Yes, my King."

Loki groaned. His eyes stayed on her until she left the room, then he took his seat on the throne.

Astrid decided to follow Loki's suggestion and go for a ride. As happy as she felt to be free to be with Loki, she couldn't help but think of Thor. Part of her felt responsible for his reaction to the Frost Giants. He felt he had to prove himself; to mend his wounded pride. After everything, she still wanted to call him her friend. There was too much history between them to dismiss it.

When Loki's day was over, he made his way to Astrid's chambers, but she wasn't there. He removed the top layers of his clothing, leaving him in his cloth tunic and pants, then he lay on top of the bed to wait.

He was drifting off to sleep when her door opened. He opened his eyes to see her smiling as she walked toward him.

"This is an unexpected surprise."

"I have felt quite abandoned lying here all alone. What kept you?"

"I took your suggestion and went riding. I helped out in the stables for a while. A day with the horses left me wanting for a bath."

Loki took in her flowing night dress, and her hair pulled up with a few tendrils falling loose. He held out his hand to her.

"Join me, darling."

Astrid climbed over him, gently kissing his lips as she went, then lay at his side. He wrapped his arm around her as her hand settled on his chest. He buried his nose in her hair and inhaled the clean scent of lavender.

Astrid sighed when she felt Loki's fingers in her hair. Tending to the horses had left her exhausted, but Loki's presence kept her from falling asleep.

"This is so much nicer," she said.

"Nicer than what?"

"All the sneaking around; rushing through making love so we wouldn't get caught... which we did anyway."

"Well, we are together now. No more hiding."

He kissed her head.

"How was you day, my King?"

Loki groaned. "What is it about the way you say that?"

Astrid smiled. "The way I say what, my King?"

Loki flipped Astrid onto her back and pinned her arms next to her head. She let out a squeal before laughter took its place. Loki ran his nose along hers, then captured her lips.

"I cannot tell you how many times I thought of you today," Loki whispered.

"Same."

"Did you think of the vision I gave us on the throne?"

Loki kissed her neck, and Astrid moaned.

"Yes."

"Had those guards not been there, that would have been no mere vision."

Astrid moaned again, and Loki's hand traveled down her arm to her breast. Her now freed hand tangled in his hair.

"That was no mere vision. I felt you as if you were inside me. I was quite frustrated when you stopped."

She smiled and pulled him into a kiss.

"As was I," Loki said between kisses.

His hand slid down between her legs and pulled up the fabric of her dress before slipping beneath. Astrid gasped and rolled her hips against his hand.

"Nothing beats the real thing, though," Loki said. "Right, my love?"

He didn't wait for a response. His lips captured hers in a deep kiss.

Astrid turned her head to take a breath, and pulled Loki's earlobe between her teeth.

"I am finally yours," she whispered.

"You were always mine."

"Always."


	11. Chapter 11

Astrid had fallen asleep on her stomach, exhausted after making love. She opened her eyes and saw Loki propped up on his elbow, his head resting in his hand, as he rubbed her back.

"Good morning, darling."

"Good morning."

Astrid moved closer to him and wrapped her arms around his him.

"I can finally wake up next to you," she whispered in his ear.

"For as long as you wish."

"Is forever too long?"

"Not long enough."

Loki kissed her as he lay her on her back. He brushed his fingers through her hair, and sighed.

"I want to move you into my chambers," Loki said. "We obviously cannot remain in these."

"No, but will that be allowed before we're married?"

"I am King, darling," he said with a smile. "Or have you forgotten?"

"I have not forgotten, my King."

Loki groaned and kissed her hard.

"We need to get up," he said. "I have a full day, I'm sure."

"Can we not lie here all day, my King?"

Loki gave her hip a playful squeeze.

"You are a temptress."

"Am I?"

He kissed the tip of her nose.

"A seductress."

"And you so innocently kiss the nose of such a woman?"

"When I am in love with her, yes." Loki ran his nose along the side of her neck, and sighed. "Tell me you love me, darling."

Astrid took Loki's face in her hands to make him look into her eyes.

"I love you more than my life, my love."

Loki ran his thumb over her cheek, then leaned in for a soft kiss. He pulled Astrid's legs around his waist and ground his hips against hers, and she gasped.

"You will be late," she said.

"Let them wait... I am King, after all."

Astrid giggled before Loki captured her lips again.

Loki sent a few servants to move Astrid's things from Thor's chambers to his. While she packed and organized, Astrid could see the questioning faces. Some of them held a judgement that she knew she didn't deserve. So, when everything was moved, she asked them to remain a moment.

"I can imagine the rumors making their way through the palace," she said. "I want to clear up one thing right now. I am no longer Thor's wife. Our marriage was annulled by the Allfather the day of Thor's coronation celebration. We all know that many events happened that day, tragic and sobering events, and I can see accusations in the eyes of many around the palace, but I can assure you I am just as saddened as you are. When the Allfather awakens, everything will be made clear, and we will hopefully get Thor back."

The servants gave a slight bow of the head, and left. Astrid looked at her things in Loki's chambers. This was where she was meant to be. She felt at home.

But this wasn't her home now; not since she was no longer Thor's wife. As much as she and Loki loved each other, and they knew they would be together, she was once again a guest of the palace.

She still hadn't spoken to her parents. Frigga's response to her father's inquiry had held his tongue and his questions, but that wouldn't last. They were still in the palace, but would be leaving that day. He would seek her out.

She decided not to wait. She went to the guest chamber where her parents slept. Her mother hugged her and ushered her in to sit.

"So much has happened," her mother said. "Are you all right?"

"I am fine."

"Your husband is banished," her father said, "and you are fine? This cannot bode well for your future."

Astrid took a deep breath and looked her father directly in the eyes.

"Thor is no longer my husband."

"I beg your pardon?"

"The Allfather annulled the marriage after the Frost Giants appeared, before Thor ran off to Jotunheim."

Her father stood. "How could he? Why?"

"It was at my request."

"Your request?"

"And I was supported by Queen Frigga. She actually listened to me."

Astrid's mother placed her hand on her husband's arm, and he sat down.

"I'm listening."

"The day I was informed of my betrothal to Thor, I made it plain that I was in love with another."

"Not this foolishness again," her father mumbled.

"That other is Loki."

"Prince Loki?" Her mother leaned forward.

"I have loved him for many years, but was afraid to tell him for fear of losing my dearest friend. As it turns out, he felt the same about me. We confessed our love to one another when I returned from our trip."

"Well," Astrid's mother said, "Loki is still a fine match."

"Nonsense," her father said, "Loki will not be King."

Astrid stood. "Loki _is_ King. At least until the Allfather awakens. Then, we will be married."

"Surely, the Allfather had some reason other than this silly romance to annul your marriage to Thor?"

"Yes. Loki and I continued to see each other in secret. Thor discovered us."

Her father stood. "You've brought this shame on our family? You are lucky he agreed to your request of annulment!"

"He agreed because I never gave myself to Thor as his wife! When Thor discovered Loki, he threatened to take his right as a husband, without my consent, on the night of his coronation. That is when I went to Queen Frigga. She spoke to the Allfather."

"Astrid," he mother stood and embraced her, "poor child."

"Poor child?"

"Yes! If she denied herself to Thor, then she must truly love Loki. When I gave myself to you as wife, I knew my previous love had not been as strong as I thought. Yet, Astrid endured so much time without her love, and never submitted to Thor's affections. Darling, we cannot keep them apart if marriage to the future King could not." She looked to Astrid again. "And to think that Thor would take what was not willingly offered..."

"Part of me hopes he was only blustering. I cannot imagine the man I called friend for so long treating me that way, but he was so angry."

"Understandably so," her father added.

"Yes. I do agree," Astrid said.

"And if Thor's banishment is ended, and he takes the throne as intended, will he not be angry still?"

"He may be."

"And what will you do, then?"

Astrid thought a moment. She had not considered this possibility.

"Loki and I will face whatever the consequences may be."

"This is absurd! You will-"

He was interrupted by a knock on the door. It was one of Loki's guards.

"Forgive the intrusion, sir, but Loki sent me to seek out Miss Astrid."

Astrid stepped forward. "Is something wrong?"

"I am to escort you to the throne room."

"Good," her father said. "We can all go."

"Father-"

"I will confront the man who ruined my daughter's future."

Astrid sighed as her father took her mother's arm and followed the guard. She was right behind them.

Loki couldn't hide the surprise on his face when Astrid's parents entered the throne room. They bowed, but Astrid just smiled at Loki.

"Bow, child," her father said through clenched teeth.

"Astrid does not bow to me," Loki said.

He stood and walked to her, took her hand and tilted his head in a slight bow. Astrid's mother gasped, but Loki ignored it as he kissed Astrid's hand.

"I did not know you were bringing guests, my love."

"Father insisted."

Loki returned to the throne and sat.

"You wish to speak with me, sir?" Loki asked.

"Yes... my King. You and my daughter have caused a lot of trouble. You may think you can have whomever you-"

"Let me stop you, sir. I understand your hostility toward me. I was hoping to talk things over with you privately, man to man, hopefully very soon."

"What is wrong with the present?"

"I wish to speak man to man, not King to servant."

"I am no servant."

Loki stood and descended the stairs once more.

"You are a servant of the Throne of Asgard. You serve its interests, and the will of the man who sits on it. Is that not true?"

"It... it is."

"Unlike most kings, we do not wear crowns. Would you say then that this helmet is the symbol of my power?"

"If you wish, my King."

"Very well."

Loki took off his horned helmet, bent down, and placed it at Astrid's feet. When he stood again, he faced her father.

"I would trade that throne, this palace, my title even as Prince, to make your daughter happy. Yet, at the moment, I have a duty to my father that I must fulfill in Thor's absence. 

When my father awakens, and my duty is over, I will come to you as a humble man who is so in love with your daughter that I, sir, will then bow to you and ask for her hand in marriage."

Astrid's mother gasped and grabbed her husband's arm. His eyes were wide.

"Even then you will be Prince. To bow to me would be-"

"My right, and an expression of my love for Astrid."

He took Astrid's hand and smiled at her. Tears moistened her eyes, and Loki wiped one away with his thumb as it slid down her cheek.

Astrid's father cleared his throat. "There is no need. Any man who treats my daughter with such tenderness and devotion is more than worthy of her. You have my blessing."

Astrid's eyes landed on her father. Her eyes widened, and a hint of a smile played at her lips, hesitant to come out fully.

"Truly, Father?"

Her father held his hand out to her, and she took it.

"I have only ever wanted your happiness, Astrid. Everything I have done has been to secure your future with a good husband. You always seemed to love Thor, and so I thought it the perfect much."

"I do love Thor, Father, but only-"

"I know that now, child. I thought your behavior was simply an act of rebellion against me making the arrangement. I had no idea that you truly did not want to marry Thor. I want you to be happy."

"Loki makes me happy."

"I can see that. Your face speaks volumes at the mention of his name."

Astrid blushed and could no longer contain her smile.

"Thank you, Father," she said as she hugged him.

"I love you, Astrid."

"I love you, too."

He took her hand and placed it in Loki's.

"I am entrusting my daughter's life to you. King or Prince, if you should fall short, you will answer to me."

"Well understood, sir," Loki said.

Astrid picked up Loki's helmet and helped him put it on again.

"My King," she whispered.

Loki smiled and kissed her hand, then turned to her parents.

"I must ask you to excuse us. I did call for Astrid alone, and I still wish to speak with her."

"Of course," her father said.

Her parents gave a slight bow, then left the room.


End file.
